Let it snow...let it snow....

We had the worst winter showers in 18 years. I m so happy to see Shazmeen and Nora enjoying the snow. I was getting ready to go to work on....
Monday morning when I look outside the window, it was snowing heavily....Everything was white. Woke up Shazmeen and Nora at 7 am and they are so excited to see the heavy snow shower. They put their cloth on and winter jacket and went outside to play with the snow. It was fun.
I left for work that morning only to be told when I got there to go home and no plant or site is open. So, we had a day off...and being paid for it.
Tuesday the snow was on the ground and it's cold. Went to work as usual only to be told after 10 mins at the office to go home...AGAIN! I m getting used to this now.....
Today....again I was told to go home but since I have work to do and reports to finish, I decided to stay on. The day was sunny but rather chilly....
Tomorrow...well the Met Office web site indicate that it will be snowing again. Well....let it snow...let it snow....let it snow.....

Finally..........I'm back....

It's been a long time since I had the chance to write on my own blog but I guess I must have writer's block.....It's almost a month into the new year...How fast the time flies....
It's been quite worrying looking at the economy in the UK now as too many companies are closing down. We had to take a pay cut of 15% from this month and heard it from the grapevine there is another 10% paycut in February. Job prospect in not good and my best options is to hang on to what I have.
I m so looking forward to come back to Malaysia but if it is worst there I m in a dilemma! I need to come home because of my parents and I sincerely hope with the grace of Allah, we are home soon..........

Life, its all about touching-
Bringing sunshine to others
Who dwell in gloom,
Giving a word of encouragement
To the faint hearted.
Gentle squeezes of a hug
To lift the spirit,
Wiping tears
From those that are crushed.
A kind word to an elder
To show they are loved,
Blessing the birth
Of a newborn child.
Holding of the hands
Sharing the warmth,
Giving our hearts
To commitments in life.
Sharing that special love
With someone so close,
It only takes a second
To touch a longing heart
Only to make a difference

Happy New Year 2009

Today begins another year of challenges and hopefully a better year for all of us. I am so looking forward to go back to Malaysia this year with the family........

Tears of Happiness........

Tears does not belong to our despair only,
even happiness can sometimes make you cry.
Desolation does not always mean being lonely,
it can also deliver you a feeling of sympathy.

Tears are not always at the prey of only fate,
they flow not only at the depart of a soulmate.
Even their reunion can make their eyes go wet,
impression of past can then only make them upset.

They're there beside, even when you achieve a goal,
they accompany you when you try lean on sand's poll.
They will roll down when your happiness is at it's peak,
they will make you strong, and can even make you weak.

They show the feelings resting deep inside our heart,
though we hide them within, and don't let them part.
They flow as they're tired of being,for so long,inside us,
we store them because they might just create some fuss.

They are the essence of someone's sweet innocence,
they are sometimes the proof of someone's presence.
Tears, for sure, does not envelope our despair always,
they allow the unspoken emotions to flow in a simple way.

The fear i have......

The fears I have is a fear unheard and yet indescribable
For the fears that I fear hurts me deeper than being lied to
You see the fears I have is in categories of three
You have hurt, death, and then there's reality

For the fear of hurt has been on my back for many years
The pain that I sometimes feel doesn't exactly overcome my fears
I've been hurt basically my whole life
But just being me it caused terrible sacrifice

And the fear of death
Oh! How greatly I fear that
Not being able to figure out how people are going to remember you
Are they going to remember you as that man who was sad and blue

For the fears that I fear will not quickly go away
Unless I continued to ignore them overcome them day by day
But the utmost fear that I have is life itself
Dealing with the lost of other's and standing alone by yourself

For that fear is reality:
You see little kids getting shot
And yet you ask yourself God why doesn't it all just stop
If only you had the upper strength and authority
To change everything including the hell of reality

Memories.......

I called Rahman today and had a long chat with him. Been catching up what I have missed. Sad to learn that another good friend of ours screw him up in a car dealing. Talking to him bring back good memories. I knew him when his daughter is only 3 years old and now she is married. How fast time flies....

TGIF.....

Well, another week have gone by and the end of the year is getting closer. I have a very good friend back in Malaysia- Rahman Sulaiman. I called him Cik Man and we have been friends for the last 20 years. When I left Malaysia, I never thought I will here this long. Never say goodbye to him before I left but we do keep in touch either by email or telephone. Anyway, every end of the year, I always called him to wish him Happy New Year and we always say 'Hoping the coming year will be a better year!'
As for me, the last 2 years have been good and have been blessed by Allah. I have a good permanent job, a good house that we lived in though financially we are still struggling. Since 2005, we have been struggling very hard. We have gone through some tough time. We have been thrown out from the house we lived in as I cannot afford to pay the rent for 5 months. Shazmeen was only 11 months then. We had to move out immediately as the landlord cannot give us anymore time. He came one evening and throw us out of the house. We manage to take only a bag each of our cloth. He kept all our belongings till now until I have the money to pay him. I m paying him slowly whenever I can.
Since we don't have any money and any place to go, I had to leave Nora and Shazmeen at a friend's room for 2 night. I was very sad and devastated to put them in that situation but I had no choice! I slept in the car for 2 nights. I had a crappy job which pays only £180 a week. From there, we stayed in a hotel for 2 nights until eventually we managed to get a studio flat for £150 a week. We have only £30 to live on. We stayed there for about 3 months until July 2007. I was offered to work with PC Harrington Ltd. I m looking forward to that. I was to report duty on 30/07/2008.
As we have given noticed to move from where we lived, we had to move out without having another placed to go. With all our bags in the car, we drove to Hayes to look for a room to live. With only £100 in the pocket, our futures look bleak. I felt so sorry for Nora and Shazmeen.......
But as always, ever since we are here, Allah always protect us and always show us a way and a solution out of our predicament. We found a room just before Maghrib and the landlord agrees to take a deposit of only £50 till my next payday. The room was not brilliant-on top of his shop. But at least we have a room for the night and weeks coming............
I started my new job with PC Harrington the following Monday. My new boss-Trevor Healy was brilliant. I get along fine with everybody. The wages was ok and I know from then onwards we will be ok....